Let’s count the ways Australia is trying to kill all the Australians.
1. Pythons eating everything.
Snake + flying fox = monstrous.
2. Pythons so big they can lift wallabies.
3. Pythons on the loose in op shops.
AP / Via huffingtonpost.com
4. Snakes on the loose inside toilets.
5. Snakes eating goannas.
6. Snakes on golf courses.
7. Snakes on planes.
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Robert Weber / Reuters
Passengers on a flight from Australia to Papua New Guinea were shocked to look out their cabin windows to find a 3-metre snake on the wing of the plane.
8. Flying foxes generally.
Catching diseases directly from flying foxes is extremely unlikely. However they are known as hosts to two life-threatening viruses. Source: outbreak.gov.au
9. Dingoes eating sharks.
10. Sharks eating golfers.
Well, threatening to.
11. Great white sharks surfing.
12. Crocodiles surfing.
Sharon Scoble / Via abc.net.au
13. Crocodiles in swimming enclosures.
Courier Mail / Via imgur.com
14. Crocodiles in creeks.
15. Crocodiles in the street.
16. Crocodiles EATEN by snakes.
Tiffany Corlis / Via ABC Queensland
17. Just goddamn MASSIVE crocs.
Michael Franchi / Rex USA
18. Paralysis ticks. Before and after feeding.
Murdoch University / Via media.murdoch.edu.au
19. Spiders. Lots of spiders.
Daniel Munoz / Reuters
20. Bucket full of funnel web spiders collected from a Blue Mountains campsite. Each one can deliver a fatal bite.
21. Beetles. Swarming soldier beetles.
22. Flies. Lots of flies.
23. Plagues of millipedes.
Every winter accidentally introduced black Portuguese millipedes go crazy in Western Australia. Source: howtoaustralia.com.au
24. Giant earthworms. OK, not dangerous, but BLEUGH!
25. Mole crickets. Nature gone horribly WRONG.
26. Giant venomous centipedes.
Giant centipedes may bite if disturbed or handled, the bite may cause severe pain that can persist for days. Source: Australian Museum
Giant centipedes that kill snakes?! Oh Australia!
27. Giant, pissed-off cassowaries.
28. Mysterious giant jellyfish.
Richard Lim / Via abc.net.au
29. Irukandji jellyfish. Perhaps the most dangerous creature in Australia, despite being no bigger than a thumbnail.
Irukandji venom is 100 times as potent as that of a cobra and 1,000 times as potent as that of a tarantula. Source: themorningbulletin.com.au
30. Box jellyfish are not something you want to be stung by either.
31. Blue-ringed octopus are the only species of octopus fatal to humans.
No antivenom is available, making them one of the deadliest inhabitants in Australia’s ocean. Source: toxinology.com
32. Predatory marble cone snail stings can cause respiratory muscle paralysis leading to death.
University of Melbourne / Via unimelb.edu.au
The most venomous of the 500 known cone snail species, several human deaths have been attributed to them. Their venom is delivered via a harpoonlike tooth propelled from an extendable proboscis. Source: National Geographic
33. Danger! Stonefish, Earth’s most venomous fish.
34. Extremely well-camouflaged stonefish look like an encrusted rock or lump of coral.
The reef stonefish has spines in the dorsal fin which can inject a highly toxic venom that can causes intense pain and can lead to death. Source: Australian Museum
35. Also, the sting is not a good look.
36. Watch the skies! The hail can kill.
37. Even bloody freshwater swim holes can be dangerous!
Amoebic meningitis is rare and highly lethal, with a less than 3% survival rate. DO NOT GO IN THE WATER. Source: Centers for Disease Control and Prevention